What makes some people more successful, inspirational,
trustworthy, motivating and generally more on top of their field than others?
Is it talent, or skill, training, education, money? There are a lot of people
with education, money, talent and skill that somehow don’t get anywhere. If this sounds like a business question, that's because it is. It's about the business of being the most you can be in whatever you do and with whoever you are. Since i play in the yoga and wellness sandbox, I will focus on that.
I love observing people. I have many private clients from
all walks of life and many yoga students from all parts of the county and some
from other countries all together. All of them are engaged or retired from one
profession or another and all of them have their own goals, aspirations,
challenges and interest. I get to know them intimately through the practice of
yoga and see them in their grubbiest instead of their Sunday’s best, sweating,
sitting quietly, struggling, enjoying, crying, laughing and chatting with
everyone else.
I have also had ample opportunities to interact with yoga teachers and wellness workers since 2002 in the capacity of a yoga studio owner and for almost 2 decades in the capacity of a yoga student and wellness informed practitioner. Finally, I also learn by dedicating time to learning. That’s why I am
finishing up my Master's in Integral Psychology. That's why i am constantly doing research.
Here's what I’ve learned:
Attitude matters more than anything. I’ve seen people fake
it till they make it. I’ve seen people who never try because they are inundated
with self defeating attitudes. I’ve seen everything in between. Attitudes are
based on beliefs. Some beliefs are great to have, some are useless, some are
downright harmful, and some are neither. The thing is, all beliefs and all
attitudes are flexible concoctions and mutations. Too bad that most people
forget that and stick to what they’ve got, never adjusting.
If we stick to our guns and do not examine our behavior, reactions and tendencies, we are prone to being polarized. We will like or dislike people - some of the ones we dislike may have something to teach us. We will seek or avoid interactions - some of the ones we avoid may be great learning opportunities. We will be defensive when an opposing view appears and we will be emotional in our defensiveness. We will shay away form anything that makes us feel uncomfortable and our experiences will be limited to the few people, places and circumstances that we do feel comfortable in. In other words, most of the world is likely to be outside of our comfort zone. As you already know, magic usually happens outside of your comfort zone. That is if you understand magic as a process of growth, refinement and unexpected surprises in the box of chocolates that Life is.
Another thing about attitudes is that they seep through our
skin. Whatever we belief, we wear on our sleeves. Our emotions are nicely
coordinated with our beliefs and give away our attitudes even if we try to hide
them. Furthermore, whatever beliefs and attitudes we have, are constantly
functioning on the background of whatever else we are involved in. So, this
determines our relationships with our friends, but also with our clients,
co-workers, co-creators, our own experience in every moment - in a subconscious
kind of way.
Our own growing, our own sense of worth, our own
experiences, all those skills we’ve learned because of all those experiences,
the talents and sensitivities we’ve developed, the things we’ve done and not
done – all of it constitutes the background of our present moments. Those who
live from well digested experiences with the wisdom and compassion that
inevitably follow, are those who you usually find yourself most affected by.
They are the ones that manage to inspire you and provide benefit and value to
you. They truly serve you, not just say so. They make you a better person, not
just tell you how nice you are.
I am sure you can think of a therapist, a yoga teacher, a massage practitioner, a pastor, anyone who among others makes you feel more alive. Yes, they may seem more educated or professional but they also come forth with more certitude with more openness and more availability to you. That's because they have a background that supports them in being so available and open.
Think about what you have on the background that seeps
through your pores while you try to smile, sound spiritual, look friendly, make
people like you, grow your business, or make a difference. Now think of people who have told you all the right things and somehow did not convince you. Perhaps, you have been the person saying all the right things, knowing what you should be doing and yet being unconvincing to others and can't follow through with your own plans and ideas.
No one is perfect, but we have an obligation and the fun of
having to be the best we can be. If we put that obligation and fun into the context of interconnectedness instead of just doing it for our own selves, we then become motivated for the sake of all beings. Everything we do then, becomes a spiritual practice and we become mindful of our feeling attitudes towards life, human nature
and our selves. Everything spiritual
is profound and bound to make an impact on everyone you come in contact with.
So, check attitude. Get an adjustment. Repeat as needed. Cheers.
PS. Call me if you need help.
Valentina Petrova
(E-RYT500) is the owner of HMC Yoga & Wellness SPA in Morro Bay, since
2002. She’s an experienced yoga teacher, Reiki Master, Life & Spiritual
Advisor. For more info, visit the web at www.HolisticMovementCenter.com
or call Val at (805)909-1401.
